This is Not the Hemma-Roid You Were Looking For, Day 226/35th Anniversary of That Joke in The Year of Fun.

This is Not the Hemma-Roid You Were Looking For, Day 226/35th Anniversary of That Joke in The Year of Fun.

1. With the Implementation of Widespread Public Toilet Facilities, Society Learned to Hone it’s Collective Cognitive Dissonance Skills toward the Physical. — From The Cognitive Dissident’s Guide to Getting Through the Day, Hygenics.

2. Pick Tonight’s Entertainment Based Solely on the Interest Level of the Entertainment, Not on Ambition.

3. Gen X Geezers (CNBC) — Guys My Age Reminisce About The P.I. (Pre-Internet) Age. Sponsored by Cialis and Rockabilly.

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My DVR’ing of Breaking Bad Broke Bad In The Year of Fun.

Going Bankrupt from The Showcase Showdown Taxes, Day 225, The Price is Right in The Year of Fun.

1. Serenade Grandma Nude for Thanksgiving.

2. Assign Characters from Red Hot Wet American Summer to Their Equivalent Characters in the Original Friday the Thirteenth. #comedynerdclassproject

3. My DVR’ing of Breaking Bad Broke Bad. (It’s Blank Blank Blank Broke Bad Day. Also, Had to Get the Next Day Air, So That’s as Bad as What Happened, Right?)

Drinking Different On-Sale Beers As A Way to Feel Wealthy, Day 224, Not an Alcoholic in the Year of Fun.

Drinking Different On-Sale Beers As A Way to Feel Wealthy, Day 224, Not an Alcoholic in the Year of Fun.

1. Turns Out There’s a Whole Buttload of I’s in Team. A Team’s Worth.

2. What?

3. On Key Ring:
Keys to My Heart, House, Old House, Dignity, Old Car, Sanity, 8th Grade Locker, Bike Lock, Sexuality, Common Sense, A Small Nebraska Town, Car Trunk, Shed (Storage), Shed (Evil Going-ons), Work, Teeth Picking.

Pop Culture Today: Watched The Fall (BBC/Netflix) with Gillian Anderson. In the same headspace as Top of the Lake, but with split focus paralleling the killer and detective. Very dark. So, what’s next Broadchurch? The spiritual heir to The Red Riding Trilogy.

I think the ladies of Orange is the New Black have more fun at work than I do. Also, more heartbreak.

Day 223 in Sideways Eight.

Day 223 in An Infinite Series.

1. “Wow, Even These Toilet Roll Instructions Sound Fancy in French. Such a Romantic Lang-Wa-Franca.” — Guy from Midwest, Not Pooping.

2. While I Liked the Writing in Red Dead Redemption Better, LA Noire had Better Acting. — Me, Outdated.

3. Ways I Could Never Be A Serial Killer Like the Ones on TeeVee:
Can’t Afford Rental on Second Location,
Need at Least Seven Uninterrupted Hours of Sleep Every Single Night,
Can’t Tie Secure Knots,
Not Really Much of a Good Liar,
Not Handsome Enough,
Hard Time Compartmentalizing,
Abhor the Killing or Harming of Other People by Me or Anyone Like All Non-Serial Killers Humans.

Nostalgia Today: Magic the Gathering World Tournaments on ESPN2.

All about me, on a Sunday no less. Happy Breaking Bad!

Hiding Out on Saturday Night, Day 222, An Early Bed in The Year of Fun.

Hiding Out on Saturday Night, Day 222, An Early Bed in The Year of Fun.

1. Create Cathartic Art. (Hard)
Finish Art. (Still Hard)
Brag About Art Plans. (Easy)

2. Move Over Sharks, America’s Multi-Tentacled Love Affair with Octopi Will Soon Have You in it’s Grip and Suckered. — Desperate Days at Shark Week’s Biggest Competitor.

3. Fantasize Fantasy Football. InFantilize Footy Fancies. Facebook Phantasy Freakout.

#T1DT: Sam’s Club trip for crates of melatonin.

11 Bucks and A College Degree, Day 221, So Millennial in The Year of Fun.

11 Bucks and A College Degree, Day 221, So Millennial in The Year of Fun.

1. Lil Dijon, The French Children’s Rapper. Premise Supplied, You Supply the Lyric. (I’m Tired)

2. Busy, But Still Want to Get to Heaven? The Quarter Church, Only Once a Month for Double the Tithe. — The Quarter Church Promotional Materials (1996).

3. 1DamnThing.com — The Site/App to Catalog/Share the One Damn Thing You Did Today That Wasn’t Just Work or Empty Pursuit, Something That May Actually Be Productive. #1DT

These Two Songs in This Order:

Today’s 1DT: I mowed the lawn. Not much more. Still, it’s one damn thing I did today.

Day 220 on A Friday this Year.

Day 220 on A Friday this Year.

1. Scrap Artery Wall for Delicious Cheese.

2. Start Twitter Feed with Only “The Person Below” Accounts So My Feed is One Giant Circle Jerk.

3. Don’t Order the Calamari. — My Advice to Any Character in a Cronenberg Movie (David or Brandon).

More Praise from My Large Spam Following:

New comment on your post “Bitten By A Jelly Fish in The Sea of Possibility, Day ’93, Oh, The Years of Fun”
Author : equipo contra incendio (IP: 5.144.176.135 , 5.144.176.135)
E-mail : marcpilcher@hotmail.com
Comment:
Hmm it looks like your blog ate my first comment (it was super long)
so I guess I’ll just sum it up what I had written and say, I’m thoroughly enjoying your blog.
I as well am an aspiring blog blogger but I’m still new to everything. Do you have any recommendations for first-time blog writers? I’d
genuinely appreciate it.

***

Gosh, first off, I’m a blogger, wow, the big leagues! My first piece of advice, drop the Hotmail account, maybe then you wouldn’t be blaming my blog for losing your post. Or maybe I saw it and just didn’t answer, but through sheer passive-aggressiveness you still pin all the blame on me. I’m answering now, jerk.
I gotta idea, aspiring blogger— blog. You know, the ‘duh’ advice every writer says. Write. Read. Work.
Oh, don’t belittle those from whom you’re pretending to get advice.
Just, Write, Read and Work, aspiring blog blogger.

Sorry about being so snippy. Usually my spam praise comments tend to be nicer and contain more non-sequiturs.

B.